three times

This virus is being retarded. I've had a sore throat for the past 3 days. My nose gets runny then it gets unrunny (it's a word... it's new, but it's a word) and this lingering cough type thing that causes me to... 'cough.' So all I'm asking is to be infected properly. I can't stand this half assed infection. Either don't infect me... or make me one sick sick sick person. Illness-wise please and not the gross kind of sick where you stick pieces of raw meat on your head to attract zombie dogs that bring you pieces of Michael Vick. That's gross. I saw him run for a 1st down against the Redskins. As much as I like the Redskins, I do think they should change the name. Um... the Zombie Dogs. That'll be a good name. Or like the Andrew Jacksons if they still want to be dicks about things. Or whatever... Team A or something. Or if they want to keep the colors they can call themselves the Hot Dogs. I've been smelling hot dogs a lot while driving home.. driving home will be reduced now that I don't think I have a place to drive to anymore.

Oh, about that virus. Just call it ass flu next year because it's a pain in my ass to be ass infected... see what I did there? I said ass threeeeee times!

tangent

Something smells like cigarette smoke. I'm 83% sure it's not cigarette smoke, but it really really smells like it. The only thing that may be causing this is if I tried doing some sort of magic trick involving a cigarette and my nose. The one where you take a cigarette and open it up and your nose is in it. It's absolutely terrifying. Half the people that see it vomit. And sometimes if there's a dog around it'll grab my nose and I'll have to chase after it. "No Mr. Growls! Come back here!"

tangent - diverging from an original purpose or course or a tan gentleman

asdfjkl;

My ears are ringing ever so slightly. It's not really bothering me. In fact, if I were to go deaf tonight, I wouldn't be upset about it. Sure, I wouldn't be able to discover new music with my ears... but the fact that this ringing was caused by standing a little too close to the amps in Anaheim makes everything ok.

I was hoping that they'd tell me, "We don't serve your kind in here." Just so I could say, "What do you mean? I'm not a droid." That didn't happen.

I met a Mexican immigrant today too. Just out of nowhere. He started talking, I told him I was a Chino. He said he was an immigrant. He said Dios to him is very different to what Dios is to the people here. He spoke of a lack of respect between Americans and others. All I could do was assure him that we're not all like that. Also we both agreed that Mexican food and Chinese food is delicious.

I'm feeling both cold and warm right now. I owe the world too much.

More about 'Rocktober'

I just got an email from Guitar Center telling me about their "Rocktober Sales Event." I'm very very close to not going to Guitar Center ever again... something like a foot a at least a good amount of inches away from it. The first thing I thought of when I got the email? "Stop saying Rocktober." Followed by, "Why the hell do they keep calling it Rocktober?" Just give me one good reason to call it that. Just one. If you can do that then go ahead and call it whatever you want. For Guitar Center... a sale is not a good reason. Who's in charge of naming the sales anyways? What happened to the monsters and ghosts and stuff? Where are my 'ghoulish' savings and my prices slashed and slashed with every butcher knife, chainsaw, and... uh... ant farm there is. I couldn't think of anything else. But yeah... call it anything but Rocktober. Fishtober. Asstober. Old-balding-redhaired-guy-that-directed-Willow-tober.

I really really think that the part of my brain that tells my heart to beat and my lungs to breathe doesn't work 100% of the time.

vector... something.. it's a line

Is it just me or did Google extend their search box? It's bothering the hell out of me... It's at least an inch or so longer (2.54 cm). Now I need to sit here and figure out whether it's my computer that's making it appear longer or if it's always been that way or if somehow my head was smashed hamburger-wise and everything is extended. Really, it's like 5 inches or something (12.7 cm). Who searches for something that takes up 5 inches of text? What's the longest thing I've searched for? A snake... no wait. A bridge. Some super long bridge in China or something. Snake bridge... cheese bridge... snakes don't eat cheese. Bridges do... and you can find one.. that does just that here. In California. Where the sun is way too hot... and my eyes are closing.

If I leave my guitar untuned and it's tuned in the morning, does that mean... no. If there's a koala that's tuning my guitar at night I'm going to find it and eat it and probably throw up because it tastes terrible. Oh, and they're not cute either, they look like freaks. Sloths on the other hand are very cute. Maybe.... that's not the word I'm looking for. But they always look like they spend a long time combing their hair or something.

ghosts and guitars

All I'm saying is if a ghost comes and plays my guitars, yeah, I'll be terrified, but at the same time, if the grooves are 'grooOOOOoooovy' then why not sit back and enjoy it. Did you say 'groovy' right? You're supposed to do it in that spooky-ish way. Oh. If they suck, it won't be so fun. I'll wonder what the hell is going on, because everybody knows ghosts are supposed to be awesome at the guitar.

Rocktober

Why do people keep saying "Rocktober." I don't think they know that they sound like dorks. I've been pushing for Socktober for a while... why aren't people saying that? It's so much more usable... thesaurus! It's so much more functional - I was thinking versatile the first time. So it's functional. Like, "Dude I'm totally getting some new socks because iiiiiiiiit's SOOOOCKTOBeeeeEERRRRR!" and of course you have to raise the pitch of your voice when you say it.. uh.. not sure how to demonstrate that here.. but if anything, "Socktober" is one louder... orrrr higher than "Rocktober." Stop saying Rocktober... You sound stupid. There's nothing rocking about October, so just stop. You get one day of goodness and that's Halloween... or two days if your birthday is in October, but nothing else. Now... with an octopus, which is called that because it has 8 arms (October, switch spots with August..) you can call that a Rocktopus all day, because you know, and I know that you know things like this... but if you figured out how to let an octopus breathe on land... and you stuck it in front of a drum set, you'd be absolutely grooving. Like constantly too. I have written down, "The drummer for Rush is pretty good, but he's not octopus. Why are octopuses so good at drummering?" This being after my philosophy teacher was talking about the drummer for Rush being good... Next to that I have a drawing, with an octopus on drums holding 4 drum sticks. with "The Rocktopuses" written on the bass drum.. I used to draw these pictures with the most random things happening. One of my finest works was a cigarette playing keyboards or a stand up bass or something... really, I still think that was just genius.

"Life's a mess that needs to be cleaned."