Be Nelson

"Nelson, They are all done; when the alumni association hits you up for a donation, be Nelson."

I'm not sure what that's supposed to mean. My jaw hurts.

Cocaine discovery prompts investigation by NASA

When I first saw the headline:

Cocaine discovery prompts investigation by NASA

I started thinking about what exactly this could be about. Is it about space drugs? Or maybe it's some form of cocaine that's so terribly potent that your nose falls off and you turn into Mr. Potato Head... well unfortunately it was neither of those. It was about drugs being found on the floor and people getting drug tests. Guh... come on NASA. I was expecting to see stuff like:

'Well we didn't find any water, but there was a lot of cocaine on the moon.'

Well let's just stick to taking pretty pictures with super powerful telescopes and finding planets that are really really far away so we can watch aliens do their space drugs. Really. Martian cocaine. Red planet.... something. What do they call cocaine these days? Red planet blow. Green people's coke.. You know what? Those green people on that red planet is really quite festive. We should go there for Christmas some time in the future.

NASA... let's solve this drug mystery quick so we can get back to looking for water in places it probably isn't. Can they just replace the word "water" to make things at least a little bit more exciting? I mean, I love water, but when it's space water... it sort of takes the fun out of things. So that thing they did a few months back, where they exploded a chunk of the moon or something to find water... let's fix that right now.

A few months ago NASA blew up a part of the moon to see if there were any traces of cats, monkeys, and cheap Mexican candy on the moon. There. It's like a really awesome pinata... really though... the moon is the ass of the sky. Sort of like how the ass is the moon of the body... sort of.......... ok maybe not.

Long as I can See the Light

In about 15 hours, at that time last week, my grandmother passed away. My mom tells me for the next few weeks her spirit will wander about before traveling on to a place much better than this world.

Here's "Long as I can See the Light" for your auditory pleasure. Smile.

Press play.



Tell my grandmother her legs are better now, so she can visit anytime.

sleeping

I'd sleep with my guitar, but I'm worried about rolling over and smashing it. Or it may roll over and smash me. Holy shit! 1:00 am? Good night.

spinnnnnning.

I start thinking about it and my head starts to spin.

quicksand SoP

Ok... I said I was going to write something pretty and it started out pretty enough. But towards the end I was getting dehydrated or something, so it wasn't as pretty. It was ugly. I had to use the Backspace key a lot. It was stupid. I even thought about throwing that in. "I'm dehydrated now so my writing is ugly, that's why water is so important." But I didn't... it would've been really really ugly then. Like an ugly dog wearing a ugly cat. It's terrible. Oh. and having David Bowie's "Quicksand" start playing a paragraph into my 'statement of purpose' didn't help that much either... I heard "don't believe in yourself." and it was like... holy shit... I'm going to keep listening to this song even though it's not the best thing to do when you're writing about tooting your own horn. In my case it's a guitar. I don't know what that's supposed to mean.

This tastes like soda

The Velvet Underground's Live at Max's Kansas City is better than the 1969 live album.

That's it.

If you need to ask why... well give it a listen and hear for yourself. There's a guy on there that's telling a girl that his drink tastes like soda. Awesome.

fresh bread... or strawberries

I had 8 hours to write the song of the year... I didn't.

How can this year be new if it doesn't smell like fresh bread? Fresh bread is perhaps one of the best smells there is. Really. What's better than the smell of fresh bread? If you're a dog you'd probably say another dog's butt. But I'm human. I'm going to say fresh bread... or strawberries.

Well. 364 days and so many hours to write the song of the year. It'll be about fressh bread... or strawberries.

I can't feel my fingers anymore. I'm done with this.

Happy new year... you're all so crazy though. The new year is still a month away. Ha! That's what I get for being Chinese... So maybe I still have another month to write the song of the year.

Hm.... maybe it won't be about fresh bread......... or strawberries. But maybe I'll have that for breakfast.