Dutchess and the Duke (c-ass-ette)

"Gimme yer assredd....... Address... Grmmbmbmmmbmmmgg....."

I got some tapes today. I'm still trying to figure out who put them out. I really can't read it... it's written in elvish or Klingon or one of those nerd languages, probably English. It's a bunch of weird lines.... something Records. I can read the records part. Apparently it says GGNZLA Records. I thought it said 997 Z LA Records... but what the hell, GGNZLA. GGNZLA all day.

So I got three tapes, only one of which I was interested in, The Dutchess and the Duke's. Everybody can groove on this super moody stuff. It's moody as hell. I mean, my Mom gave it an 8/10, it lost points because she said it made her feel sleepy and she wanted to hear something more lively and upbeat. So I put something more lively and upbeat on and she gave it a 7/10 because it was too noisy. She also thought the guy that was singing was a girl. My Mom likes the tape.

My only complaint is that the tapes are individually numbered, but the number doesn't match up with the hand numbering on the artwork. Bummer. More because I'm confused. Maybe these are tomorrow's lottery numbers. Who knows. I got nothing now.

Good night.

Contrast

I got a laptop. I got a headache because the whites on there are really intense. So I don't know. If I'm dying and I see that super bright light I might not go towards it. I might throw up and say turn it off or something. Where's the dimmer switch. This other place is hot, but it sure doesn't hurt my eyes. Maybe I need some sunglasses. High contrast used to be so cool until it made me super dizzy.

Automatic

So I got the Jesus and Mary Chain's Automatic in the mail today. I popped it on and it was skippy as hell. So "Here comes Alice" was ruined. I just kept thinking, because it's mainly that track that has really awful skips... did this guy carry the record around between his ass cheeks or something. Well, after a good clean I think it's all right. I think I need a new needle too. But I don't know what I'm talking about. This rubbing alcohol smells. I turned the tone wayyyy up and it's trebley as hell. This album is just full of hell.

4th

It's the 4th of July and all, America is rather happy. Hot dogs and stuff aren't too happy... I think there's something about acid that makes hot dogs talk to people. So don't do acid... especially today, things will get really noisy with all the explosions and large groups of talking hot dogs... and if you're just absolutely losing it, they'll gang up on you and throw you on the grill.

Here's a line, "That was the best dog ever." Something somebody said of a hot dog being cooked on a proper grill and not a George Foreman grill... It's a fine grill George, if you're reading this, now don't beat me up and send me a couple of fantastic (free) grills. But the thing about that line... an Asian said it. So, we need to make it a rule that whenever referring to hot dogs, we Asians call them hot dogs and not dogs... you'll just confuse people. Or whatever, just call them weiners.

It goes squared, cubed... and then what?