I got the giggles today.. because A) I sent my paper off to my professor and the graduation ball is rolling and B) I indirectly touched a guy's ass and he was shocked as hell about it. Let's skip right on over to B... because that's where all the action is.
Well... I went to Safeway and there was a guy standing there buying a lottery ticket or something. He was at a machine next to the door and it just so happened that his ass cheeks hovered ever so delicately over the baskets. Now, I'm in a good mood, so I think I can do anything. An ass inches away from the baskets? NO PROBLEM! I got this. So I reach down, and grab a hold of the handle (not a euphemism) and think... "To avoid the ass, I need to pull up at an angle such that the occurrence of basket to ass touchery is avoided." Welllllll.... I pulled. The basket came up... and the basket touched his ass... well.. I say touched.. it was more like the basket came up and the corner went into his gooch and I rammed the basket right up into his ass. He jumped and let out this groan... and all I could say was, "Oh, So-rry" I mean... what was the guy thinking when it happened? "Let's seee... lottery lottery lottery.. big bucks. big buck$$$.. I need some good numbers... big numbers.. no that's too big... maybe sevente- Gruh! Did that guy just shove the corner of a basket in my ass?" I did see him shopping when I passed the kombucha and was thinking that's really gross stuff... part of me wanted to apologize again... but the rest of me knew that I would start laughing if I did.
So really. I'm sorry. I really am... because that takes up my ass touch for the week.
Wasted. but he was probably trying to find me in Safeway to get a bit more out of me because I was so damn good.. I'm really not good. I'm not good at all.
Ok. Paper submitted and the professor says changes up to page 5 (because she's busy with other stuff) are minor.. my fundamentals are groovy, but formatting and stylistic writing stuff needs to get fixed............ because I'm an average writer.
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